Funny Aim Away Messages

Away Message Disorders

The following are some common away message disorders as classified by With away messages being so popular, these disorders are probally a lot more common than most people realize. If someone you know shows any signs of these disorders it is advised that they seek professional psycological help.

Away Messages Syndrome
The general term for any disorders related away messages.

Away Message Phobia
Fear of putting up an away message. When one leaves their computer for an extended period of time, an away message is never put up.

Compulsive Changer Disorder
Act of frequently changing one's away message despite having no need to change it. In most cases one spends more time changing his/her away message than they actually spend away.

Compulsive Checker Syndrome
Act of frequently checking away messages. Usually one checks all the away messages on their buddy list at least several times an hour.

Forever Away Disorder
Act of leaving an away message on for a very lengthy period of time. Their are two types of Forever Away Disorder:
Type A is when one is rarely at their computer and leaves their away message up.
Type B is when one is always at their computer but never takes down their away message.

Macro Messages Syndrome
Putting up away messages that are extremely long-winded, messages either give people more information than they need to know or contains no signifigant information at all.

Micro Messages Syndrome
Syndrome is the opposite of Macro Messages Syndrome, it is characterized by one who only puts up away messages that are only one word long such as "Away", "Gone", "Class", "Food", "Sleep", and "Class"

MonoMessage Syndrome
Using only one message for all occasions. The default message, "I am away from my computer right now" is the most common.

On-Off Disorder
Continuous cycle of putting up an away message, then taking it down, and putting it up again, and taking it down again and putting it up again...

Stalker Syndrome
Similar to the Compulsive Checker Syndrome except away message checking is limited to between 1-5 screen names and frequency of away message checking increases.

- Written by Away

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